Yesterday, I toured one of Jon’s two school options for the fall.  They showed me the entire school, and allowed me into every grade.  What did I come away with, with absolute certainty?  Fifth graders smell.  Really, really smell.

OK, so that wasn’t really supposed to be the point of my visit.  I had previously visited a school with an ALS (adapted life skills) class.  That class and school looked a lot like Jon’s current Kindergarten class.  I was in my comfort zone.  I could picture Jon there.

Yesterday’s school did not have such a class.  Each child spent most of the day with their peers.  There was no separate room dedicated to tutoring, no central “home base”.  Jon would still be pulled out to work with an educator 1:1 as necessary, but that would likely be at a separate desk in the same room.  The classrooms were set up in pods, so that all the classrooms in a grade were connected by a central area that had a door to the hallway.  The number of students in each class was reasonable, no more than 20, but it was loud.

Later, when I was speaking with Jon’s current teacher, I expressed my concerns.  I told her that I pictured Jon succeeding in the first situation, not the second.  She understood, but told me that the first school’s special education students were much “lower functioning” than Jon.  Not that Jon is high functioning, but that he is *higher* functioning than the other students.

So what constitutes “low” and “high functioning”?  No one can give me a good explanation.  Jon is non-verbal.  He reads well, but we have yet to figure out if he comprehends what he is reading, or just doesn’t understand how to answer questions about the text.  His math skills are below where they should be.

He does have a lot going for him.  He is very social and has great eye contact.  He understands everything that you tell him.  He plays jokes on his teachers.  In these ways, he *almost* acts like a typical 7 year-old. 

I can’t compare him to other kids with autism, because I don’t see them as often as I see Jon.  And that’s the problem, right?  I’m in a bubble here.  And do I really want to compare him anyway?  It doesn’t change anything.  He’s still my boy, I’ll still love him as much as ever.

So do I trust the professionals that he is higher functioning than the children in the first school?  Or do I go with my initial feeling that the first school was a better fit for him.  And was it really a better fit for him, or a better fit for me?  It all makes me dizzy.  And hungry.  Things I don’t understand make me hungry.  I’m hungry a lot these days.

The only thing I know for sure, after visiting all the grades in the second school, is that 5th graders smell.  Bad.  Note to self:  must remember to work on hygeine skills with the children.  But then, they won’t be “typical”.